Because of the many demands on our lives, many of us do not spend time on the things that are most important to us.  Take a look at what your life centers around.  What are you driven by?  Where do you spend your time?

For some, it’s family or friends.  Although family is important, it is possible to become imbalanced.  Some people, women in particular, tend to the needs of others at their own expense.  Many of us have been socialized to be caregivers and nurturers.  We become so focused on others, that we forget our own needs, especially when it comes to getting enough rest or exercise.  One of my past clients told me, “Between work & family, I put myself last.  Some days I get so busy, I don’t take time to eat.  Now that I’m middle-aged, I need to be concerned about my health too.”

When we’re so focused on our marriage or our family to the exclusion of all else, then if we divorce or a spouse dies, we are devastated.  We can lose the one thing that we hold most dear.  Our life feels like it’s crashing in on us.

For some, their center is their work.  Some people stake everything on their career.  They invest time and energy into their careers at the expense of other areas.  Then if they lose their job, they are devastated, because their self-worth is tied up in their job.

I was an example of career imbalance.  Years ago, I was married, working full-time at a high-tech firm, and going to school.  My goal was to earn my MBA to further my career.  I spent all my time working, studying and going to school.  I’d get up at 6:00 a.m., go to work, work at least ten hours, come home, cook dinner, clean up, and then ‘hit the books’ until about 11:00 o’clock at night when I would fall into bed exhausted.  As a result I had no time for anything else.  I had no time for my husband much less myself.

My hectic schedule was affecting my marriage.  My husband finally put his foot down.  He said,  “This is not my idea of a marriage.  You’re so busy, we never see each other.  Something has got to change, or this isn’t going to work.”  That’s when it hit me.  I realized that my priorities were out of whack.  I was so caught up in the ‘rat race’.  I was so intent on pursuing my career, that I had totally lost sight of what was truly important to me.

What about you?  Is your work so all-consuming that you’re ignoring other important areas of your life?  Are you living your life according to your priorities?  A good way to test this is to look at your calendar for the past week.  How did you spend your time?  Then compare it with your most important priorities.  Do they align?  If you’re like most people, the answer is “no”.  If so, then you need to make some changes in your life.

My wake-up call occurred more than 20 years ago.  That was the start of my life balance journey.  I made changes in order to focus on my values and priorities.  By living your life according to your purpose, values, and priorities, you’ll experience greater peace and fulfillment.

To learn more about living a balanced life, listen to the audio “The Balancing Act: Managing Work and Life”.